Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
