I wish I could punch you in the face.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Randomize
