Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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