All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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