I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
