I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize