Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
