I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
