So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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