Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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