i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
