Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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