he wants to bone in the snuggie
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
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