that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
