Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
