You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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