you traded sex for a burrito?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
