So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
