there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Randomize
