I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Randomize
