I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
