They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
