I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
I understand Curling. That high.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
