I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
