whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize