I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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