She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
