do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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