Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
