I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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