white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
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