it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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