The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
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