Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize