How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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