I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
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