Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
