I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
