38 yer olds are good kisserssss
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
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