So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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