I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
