When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Randomize
