South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Randomize
