He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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