i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Randomize
