I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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