come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
