we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
The ass gains better be worth it
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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