Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
