Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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