the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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